Back to Blogging after a few weeks reprieve!
1. If your marriage brings forth children, how do you expect it to impact the marriage?
Ken and I plan on having children. I say three, he says two…we are still communicating that conversation. I know that kids is going to change the dynamics of our relationship. Children can be very rewarding, but I have also heard how straining they can be on the parents. People who have been around me in the past few months might be sick of hearing me talk about my dog, but I do think he is a good indicator of how Ken and I will handle children. It is at a much lesser degree, I know that….I am not comparing my dog to a child…(his teeth are too sharp and he is way too fuzzy), but I have seen a change in our dynamics.
First off, a lot less sleep. Getting up every few hours to take him out, always watching him to make sure he doesn’t get into trouble, and never getting to just sit down and relax unless the little guy is sleeping. It is exhausting! I am not as energized, I am less motivated to do things around the house. Personal hygine has taken a break too. I don’t mean in an overly gross way, just I am not as worried about make up, putting in the contacts or making sure my clothes match as I am always taking the dog out in the rain and at the crack of dawn. I don’t feel like a sexy confident 27 year old with an oversized bag full of chew toys, treats, and a leash with mud streaks down the sides of my pants.
Ken comes home and I am more excited that it is his turn to watch the puppy for a bit, instead of the long embrace and long kiss we always shared walking in the door. When I walk in the door, Ken gets a quick kiss, but the wiggling puppy gets a sqeal and hugs and kisses, and rubs, and more hugs and kisses and rubs. Fair? Not really. But don’t a lot of parents do the same? Moms become so focused on their kids that the primary relationship gets pushed to the side? It is sad that it takes thought, but I think to linger over that kiss and hug Ken extra long to show how much I appreciate him and all he does.
We don’t go out to dinner or go to the movie without us worrying about the little guy at home. We are concerned that everything in the house is a choking hazard and I rarely have a conversation with my family that does not involve his recent poop activity. Lastly, I am convinced that everyone is as excited about his every achievement as Ken and I are! sounds like a kid to me.
I am trying to pay careful attention to how ken and I are behaving with the dog and looking for any negative habits that either of us might be falling into. Life with children can be very rewarding and be the happiest time of a person’s life. But people do best when they are balanced. It will be important for Ken and I to keep our own relationship strong once we begin another relationship with the newer additions to the family.
